Thursday, July 22, 2010

How to Easy-Mac

College Student Edition

Easy-Mac comes in either bowls like SpaghettiO’s or pouches like hot chocolate. I bought a box of Easy-Mac “made for the microwave” pouches the other day and started experimenting. I just made the perfect Easy-Mac. Forgive me I found this amusing.

Easy-Mac is supposed to be easy. But, cooking things in the microwave requires serious skills. For example, you can’t just put your bowl of macaroni with water and expect the water not to over flow. Let’s just say I didn’t visit the microwave for a while.

To make the perfect Easy-Mac pouch you need the following: a nice big bowl, a fork, a microwave, and the Easy-Mac pouch. Got them? Good.

Step 1. Admire the pretty pictures, frown at the terrible print quality, and skim the directions. Then separate the cheese pouch from the macaroni pouch. Pour the macaroni into the bowl.

Step 2. Now, according to the instructions take 2/3 Cup of water and poor into the nice big bowl. But, you’re a college student you don’t have money for measuring cups duh that’s why you eat Easy-Mac. So, take the empty macaroni pouch and fill it up half way using your awesome Wing-It skills. Pour the water into your nice big bowl.

Step 3. Put your nice big bowl into the microwave and nuke it for 3-4 minutes. You have two options dear friend. You can leave the microwave and come back in 3 minutes or you can stand by it in case your nice big bowl overflows. The adults will tell us that we should stay near our food when it’s cooking. I’m not going to be a hypocrite over this and I’ll let you decide.

Step 4. So Ding, it’s done. Yay! Little grasshopper I hope you’re wearing a shirt because the nice big bowl is going to be hot. So, use your awesome Wing-It skills and take the nice big bowl out of the microwave using your shirt as oven mitts. Your shirt will be called Micro-Mitt for the rest of this article.

Optional Step. Take your Micro-Mitt and hold your bowl as you drain off some of the water. This will only be necessary if your Wing-It skills failed you like they did on your first college exam.

Step 5. Take the cheese pouch and poor it into the bowl and mix your cheese! Or grab your Micro-Mitt and take your nice big bowl back to your room. You can just mix your cheese when you get back since you’re dying to write your essay.

Anyways, there ya have it. That’s how you make the perfect Easy-Mac Pouch. By the way, “just adding boiling water will not cook macaroni.” Aren't these great phone photos?


  1. I laughed so hard at this while sitting in front of my plate of dinner. By the way, perhaps I should share with you what I am having for dinner! Chicken beast sautéed in butter and garlic,Italian green beans, and steamed baby carrots and zucchini mix. I know, I am so mean! hahahaha

    Love ya, Sara