Monday, August 13, 2012
I tried watching the Perseids meteor shower Saturday night. It was too cloudy, so I only got to view a handful of meteorites. I craned my neck at the sky and after a few minutes began texting my Google Voice number. It's a good thing I didn't text anyone else, because my musings became very strange as the night progressed into morning. I edited a couple of my favorite ones.
No meteors yet.. Or worse place to browse. Shall I go back for the rum or am I sufficiently wrecked?
[For the record I had nearly two shots of rum.]
Do you know what life sounds like? It sounds like a whimper from a swollen heart full of love, life, and death.
I can just lay here. The empty sky, gracing me with its clarity, the wind dusting away the impurities of my thoughts.
The stars twinkling a gradient of lust to true understanding. While the moon undresses my pale heart with praise and pleasantries.
[I believe I'm the worlds slowest texter.]
I want to imagine him with my evening gaze. But that is not good enough for him. He'd rather exile me from his waking thought.
I used to think that for every thought he had of me I'd have one of him in return. But its all foolish.
He never thought of me that way. Or else he'd set me straight. But he did in a different way, by ignoring my soft eyes and lustful stares.
He was very clear in that regard. And likewise I shall remain strong and avoid him like the plague. Avoid this feeling of distrust for myself.
[More Rose Colored Lenses; Jaded Prescription material?]
I have been bitten by ants. It's ok. It's all very worth it right now.
[And... that's the rum talking.]
The Texas night glow is not the same without you.
[It really isn't.]
If at least in my solitude I can enjoy the blessings of this earth.
My heart sings in loneliness the love I hide but don’t show too well.
Best star gazing night ever.
Then, I began going through a list of goals and dreams. I stayed out till three in the morning when I realized that I missed the warmth of my pillow.